


we should get jerseys cuz we make a good team

by OverTheMoonShine



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Best Friends to Lovers, Canon Divergence, Coming of Age, Fluff and Light Angst, Growing Up Together, Law Student Hyungwon, M/M, Small time skips, The Sappiest Ending, idol minhyuk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:01:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28093572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OverTheMoonShine/pseuds/OverTheMoonShine
Summary: "Say Wonnie, when you're a lawyer, does that mean I get to use you for free?""You'll probably get into so much random trouble as an idol, I'll make a loss if I served you for free," Hyungwon scoffs, then grins. "I've already got it all planned out - you're going to be my biggest customer."Hyungwon and Minhyuk were always destined for each other, no matter where the directions of their separate paths took them
Relationships: Chae Hyungwon/Lee Minhyuk
Comments: 17
Kudos: 61





	we should get jerseys cuz we make a good team

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SchrodingersShanu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SchrodingersShanu/gifts).



> 1 - happy early birthday frondo!! fly over to [shanu's](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SchrodingersShanu/pseuds/SchrodingersShanu) after this for more fun fics :]
> 
> 2 - title inspired by relient k's ['must have done something right'](https://open.spotify.com/track/7H0OWqybanoiXV9HZKfwBh)
> 
> (bc my music tastes are still in the 2000s apparently)

Hyungwon knows that it’s the end when he sprains his ankle during an audition, and the only thing he feels is sheer relief that he doesn’t have to continue. Well, sheer relief with a _small_ twist of guilt because Minhyuk’s immediately by his side, abandoning his place in the group choreography. His eyes are filled with worry, and Hyungwon knows it’ll be difficult, if not impossible, to break the news.

“Don’t worry,” Minhyuk says, misinterpreting the hesitation on Hyungwon’s face for something else. The music has cut to a stop around them, and Hyungwon can feel the prickly gaze of the room on them but Minhyuk pays them no heed. He has his arm around Hyungwon as he helps him to his feet, “We’ll try again.”

But such a ‘we’ no longer exists.

It’s the first time they have a fight as vicious as this.

Even though the exchange takes place in low voices and hissed whispers (the two, acutely aware of how thin the walls of Minhyuk’s room are, unwilling to let Minhyuk’s parents know of their disagreement), the furniture in the room shakes with the intensity of their words.

"You said we were in this together,” Minhyuk spits at him. Venom drips from every syllable, leaving a toxic stain on the sheets below. They’re sitting at opposite ends of Minhyuk’s bed - far enough to demonstrate their anger with each other, yet near enough so that they don’t have to raise their voices to hear the other person. The lights are already flicked off; the moonlight streaming in enough for Hyungwon to see that one end of Minhyuk’s blanket is tailing onto the floor. He feels the strangest urge to dust it off and tuck it back onto his bed, even in the middle of the argument. “And now you’re just dropping out like that?”

“Face it, we’re not getting anywhere,” Hyungwon shoots back, and ignores the way that Minhyuk flinches at his retort. Unsaid is the number of companies they’ve been rejected by, the number of times Hyungwon pretended to be asleep (concentrating hard on making his breathing sound as even as possible) while he hears Minhyuk sniffling beside him in the middle of the night. “At least, I’d be doing something more useful with my time if I actually become a lawyer.”

“You’re just -” Minhyuk’s eyes are blazing with the heat of a thousand suns before whatever he wants to say withers up in his throat mid-sentence. He jerks his head up towards the ceiling, and blinks so furiously that Hyungwon can almost hear his eyelids open and close in the silence that permeates the room. 

“I thought you’d be by my side,” is what Minhyuk eventually says. In the darkness, Minhyuk’s words are magnified, rebounding off the walls of his room, gathering speed as they ricochet around before slamming straight-first into his chest. 

Hyungwon’s breath catches in his throat at the physical blow of Minhyuk’s words. He feels like the absolute scum of the earth, that for all the ways he’d talked big, he hadn’t even realised the real source of Minhyuk’s anger. 

_He’s dumb, he’s so so dumb._

There had never been a single doubt in his mind - no matter how much he’d been sure that his path to being an idol’s finally over - that he wouldn’t be there with Minhyuk every single step of _his_ way. The hurt in Minhyuk’s voice rattles around in his chest, as the scenario plays out in his head. One in which their paths diverge so far apart that they’ll never see even the faintest shadow of the other anymore. It’s such an impossible situation that Hyungwon almost doubles over in pain from the exertion of even contemplating the scenario.

He holds himself together, scoots over from his end of the bed, over to Minhyuk, waits till the boy turns to look at him again, eyes bright. There is anger in them, but more sadness, mostly betrayal. Hyungwon deserves the glare, ever single speck of anger and hatred directed towards him. He pauses for a moment, then slowly, hesitantly, reaches over to place his hand over Minhyuk’s. It’s a good sign that Minhyuk doesn’t pull his hand away, so he continues.

In the dim light of the room, he promises on every second of friendship they’ve shared between them, on every moment and more, “No matter what, I’ll always be by your side.”

(“Say Wonnie,” Minhyuk starts, the next day when they’re rubbing the sleep out of their red-rimmed eyes. “When you’re a lawyer, does that mean I get to use you for free?”

Hyungwon snorts, gesturing for Minhyuk to get out of bed so he can fold the sheets, “No way.”

“Excuse me?” the boy exclaims in mock indignance, butt still firmly planted on the bed.

“You’ll probably get into so much random trouble as an idol, I’ll make a loss if I served you for free,” Hyungwon answers easily, as he shoves Minhyuk off in the direction of the bathroom. “I've already got it all planned out - you’re going to be my biggest customer.”

Minhyuk whines, hand loosely catching Hyungwon’s wrist as he stumbles off to wash up so that he drags Hyungwon off with him. “Yea yea, just don’t leave me behind.”

“I would never dream of it.”)

-

Minhyuk is accepted into Starship Entertainment around the same time Hyungwon tests into Seoul National University for a Political Science degree, barely scraping by given the amount of time he’d previously sacrificed in his pursuit of stardom.

“Just think about it, by the time I debut, you’ll be done with your degree!” Minhyuk laughs, and Hyungwon can hear the sheer relief in his voice. As a tribute to their _young and wild_ days (i.e. just barely half a year ago when they were both so stressed out with auditioning and studying, they’d run to a nearby park, stripped off their jackets and played badminton badly the whole afternoon instead, their jackets tied together loosely to form a crappy net), they’re having convenience store ramyeon at a park just outside Minhyuk’s house. The hot soup does nothing to quell Minhyuk’s excitement though, and he continues, in between mouthfuls of noodles, “You’ll be all smart and stuff by then.”

“I won’t even be a real lawyer yet,” Hyungwon points out, as he lifts up a finger to wipe away a speck of sesame seed that’s glued itself to the side of Minhyuk’s face from his voracious slurping. “There’s still grad school after, and then the bar exam.”

Minhyuk takes a precious moment from gulping down his food to hit Hyungwon lightly on the head. He says with all the confidence of someone who’s slowly but surely on track to reaching his dreams, “Whatever, we’re going to get there anyway.”

Hyungwon grins at the way Minhyuk’s eyes are shining as he says this, “We will.”

Encouraged by his reaction, Minhyuk slams the half-empty ramyeon bowl onto the wooden bench they’re sitting on and stands up. He pumps both hands in the air, and Hyungwon already braces himself for the inevitable rise in volume he’s about to experience, hands already coming up to cover his ears in preparation.

Sure enough, Minhyuk lets out a long whoop that’s both longer and louder than a person who’s training to be a singer ought to sensibly do (Hyungwon’s always amazed by how much damage Minhyuk’s vocal cords are able to withstand). 

“We’re going to do it! We’re going to take the world by its neck and wring the life out of it!” Minhyuk shouts out into the blue sky above them, looking extremely chipper for someone who’s pledged ultraviolence towards the cosmos. It doesn’t even take someone who’s lived with Minhyuk for as long as Hyungwon has to see how Minhyuk’s kept these words inside him for so long, and so Hyungwon just sits beside him as he lets them all out. “Nothing’s going to stand in our way! Not anymore!”

By the end of it, Minhyuk’s noodles have gone cold in the plastic cup and his face is red with exertion. But there’s a wild happiness in his eyes - an exhilarated rush that Hyungwon hasn’t seen in a while - when Minhyuk settles down back next to him. He lets out a soft sigh, and leans against Hyungwon’s shoulder, his head fitting perfectly into the space between Hyungwon’s chin and neck.

Hyungwon smiles, as he shifts closer so that Minhyuk’s position would be more comfortable, “Whatever it is, I’ll be there with you, every step of the way.”

Minhyuk laughs, the sound bright and unrestrained, tickling the side of Hyungwon’s face, “Me too. I promise.”

-

Given how packed a trainee’s schedule is and how busy Hyungwon is juggling classes with a part-time job, it’s not rare for them to go without texting for a couple of days, maybe a phone call every week or so. 

When Minhyuk’s free though, he blows Hyungwon’s phone up, texting batches of sometimes single-word messages, one after the other, just like he used to. The messages aren’t just about trainee life but what he sees on the way to the various practices he has, what he thinks Dambi is doing at the moment ( _i hope dambi doesn’t miss me too much can you go over and show dambi photos of me???)_ , funny incidents that happened with the other trainees ( _i’m not going to let you meet any of them until i’m confirmed for debut_ , is what Minhyuk says at the start, afraid to jinx things, _i won’t even tell you who they are or send u pics of them_ ), random blurry selcas - typical stream-of-consciousness ramblings that read like nothing but also everything. 

On days like these, Hyungwon saves the barrage of messages for the end of the day, when he’s comfortably folded in bed in his room, nestled on the second floor of the university student dorms. It’s a simple one-room: his single bed pushed to one side, a desk and cupboard pushed against the other; but it feels like home. As much as home feels like, when he goes through Minhyuk’s texts slowly, savouring the strangeness of his friend’s mind.

Minhyuk calls him one day, startling Hyungwon out of a nap he’d fallen into very willingly while trying to finish up a particularly dry reading.

“What do you think of YeHa?” Minhyuk asks, without any proper introduction.

Still bleary with sleep, Hyungwon slurs into his phone, rubbing the tiredness out from his eyes, “For?” 

Minhyuk exclaims in an incredulous tone, as if Hyungwon should have known the context of the discussion all along, “My stage name!” 

“Why do you need a stage name?” 

“Because….” Minhyuk cuts himself off, his voice lilting downwards like he’s not sure of something. The sudden break in his confidence snaps Hyungwon to attention, wakes him up faster than if you were to pour a giant bucket of ice over him. Minhyuk changes tracks quickly, shifting smoothly into a more upbeat tone, “It sounds like something you’d say when you’re excited.” 

“No, it sounds like something cowboys would say. What’s wrong with Minhyuk?” 

“I don’t know,” Minhyuk answers, although his tone makes it evident that he _does_ know. So Hyungwon waits patiently for Minhyuk to gather his thoughts. It takes half a minute before the answer comes, and Minhyuk’s tone of resignation is enough to make Hyungwon’s blood boil, “The agency said it doesn’t sound special enough. There are a million Lee Minhyuks out there.”

“Okay, I guess I’m going to have to set fire to your agency building then. Sorry Min, you’re going to have to find a new place to debut.” 

“Won!” 

“You know, you’re enough, don’t you? Heck, you’re more than enough,” Hyungwon keeps himself from swearing. He looks down and notices he’s somehow at his dorm’s door, one hand on the door knob, his feet already stuffed into his sneakers, like he’s all ready to sprint over to Minhyuk’s place. He takes in a breath to calm himself down, then continues, “You’re Minhyuk, and that’s the most special thing in the world.” 

Hyungwon can hear Minhyuk rolling his eyes over the phone, “Yea yea -” 

His knuckles are white with how tightly he’s gripping the door knob, but Hyungwon keeps his voice steady, “I mean it, Min. You can call yourself whatever you want, but don’t let it be because someone thinks you’re not special enough, because you are, more than anyone else in the world.” 

It takes a moment for Minhyuk to reply, but Hyungwon knows his words are sinking in slowly. He’s ready to repeat himself; he’ll talk until his throat goes dry, until he can’t speak anymore so long as Minhyuk understands how special he is, but Minhyuk’s answer comes, soft and quiet, like he’s still in the midst of a thought, “I know, thank you.”

-

Minhyuk’s debut is confirmed on the day Hyungwon receives his results for his second year in university. 

His hands are trembling as he opens the letter, congratulatory words embossed in gold shimmering starbursts at the top of the page (it looks jarringly out of place, next to the somber logo of Seoul National University): _Dean’s Scholar List._

The first thing he does, before he even registers the rest of the letter, is snap a pic of it and send it onto Minhyuk, with an unintelligible _!!!!!_ caption.

A brightness sparks in the centre of his chest, the effervescence travelling down the length of his arms into his fingers. It grows as he scans the words of the letter, something about testing top 1% of students in his College; ends with his fingers tingling so much, they feel like they’re full of cola, fizzing away.

But nothing compares to the feeling of when his phone rings almost immediately and it’s Minhyuk.

“Wonnie,” Minhyuk says into the receiver, all breathless, like he’s lost all his words. It’s his tone, almost unrecognisable, that stirs something in Hyungwon’s gut; there’s a rush of trepidation and excitement through Hyungwon, the feeling of life and death. 

All but gasping, Minhyuk presses on, his sentence almost ends in a garbled rush of syllables, all racing to get out at once now that Minhyuk’s found the words to say, “It’s finally happening. I’m going to debut this year.”

Nothing compares to the feeling of the way he can almost hear Minhyuk’s voice break, the years of effort that has been leading up to this moment, “We did it, Wonnie. We’re getting there. All this and more.”

-

If anything, being confirmed for debut gives Minhyuk more free time than he did when he had been a languishing trainee. Rather than rushed calls and stilted text conversations, Minhyuk now has whole days when he can steal out of the dorms or practice rooms to just _hang out_ , like an everyday human being and not someone destined for stardom.

Today, they’ve decided to visit a new dessert spot that’s just opened next to Hyungwon’s dorm; then retreat to Hyungwon’s room to melt the brains with a video-game marathon. A whole day of doing nothing, such a strange luxury that has Minhyuk breaking out into giggles at times.

“Like the calm before the storm,” Minhyuk quips, scrunching his face up in suspicion, over the ice-cream sundae they’re sharing. There’s a lightness to him now, and it’s not hard to get caught up in the winds of Minhyuk’s mood, to be swept into the dazzling blue sky above, now fluffy with the clouds of possibility. 

The dessert’s almost half demolished, before he suddenly looks guilty, his face collapsing into an approximation of an apologetic expression. He says this, the level of condemnation for himself rivalling even a prisoner on death row, “I’m supposed to be on a diet.”

Hyungwon fails at stifling his laugh, at how unconvincing Minhyuk’s expression still is, particularly with how his glistening eyes are still glued to the remaining ice-cream, “I suppose, if you bribe me, I won’t tell on you.”

“Hmm,” Minhyuk hums, around a next bite he doesn’t even bother to resist taking. He waves the spoon around, “How about a signed album, for free?”

“That’s only worth something if you guys become famous,” smirks Hyungwon, reaching over to take a scoop of the sundae; Minhyuk grabs the bowl and swirls it away from him in time.

He falls back against the chair, bowl of sundae in one hand, still unfairly handsome in the way idols naturally are despite the amount of ice-cream smeared around his mouth. Minhyuk grins (Hyungwon ignores the way his heart does an odd jolt in his chest - it’s just brain freeze from sharing a 8-scoop sundae), “Just wait, we’re going to eat Korea up.”

-

It’s a week to Minhyuk’s debut, when he asks, “Wanna come over and hang?” 

To be honest, there’s a pile of assignments that Hyungwon hasn’t started on yet, but it’s not like he’s going to refuse Minhyuk. Especially not for something as dry and depressing as Hobbes’ Leviathan. “Sure. Let me know what time’s good for you.”

The sounds of a heated whispered discussion and a short scuffle are the only answer to Hyungwon’s statement. He presses his phone closer to his ear, trying to make out what exactly is happening. “Min, are you okay?”

There’s a few more seconds of silence, enough that Hyungwon wonders if he should dial for the police, his mind immediately jumping to the worst possible conclusion: that is, kidnapping, given how scary sasaengs are. Who _wouldn’t_ want to kidnap a Lee Minhyuk? 

This train of thought is brought to a rapid halt when Minhyuk comes back on the line, “Ugh, sorry, Kihyun was being a dick-” there’s a sharp _thwack!_ and Minhyuk lets out a yelp, then a growl at the offender, Hyungwon can picture his teeth bared like a tiny puppy. He continues, like nothing odd had happened, “He asks if you want to come over for dinner.”

“For dinner?”

“Yea,” grumbles Minhyuk, and Hyungwon can hear the sound of a door closing, presumably Minhyuk’s shuffled off to his own room for some semblance of privacy. “He says, he wants to meet you. Well, the members _all_ said they want to meet you.”

“What for?”

“How would I know?” He lets out a huff like he’s rolling his eyes, continues with his rambling, “Geez, they’re just being busy-bodies. It's not like anyone else’s friends were subjected to this. You don’t have to come over and meet them, if you don’t want to. I know it may seem weird.”

There’s something in the way Minhyuk offers up the Get-Out-Of-Jail-Free! card that has Hyungwon pause for a moment. The tiniest hesitation before he’d said “if you don’t want to”, the way he’d emphasised “you”, perhaps even without meaning to. The litany of reasons he’s continuing to throw out unprompted about how odd he thinks his members are being, in the wake of Hyungwon’s silence.

Hyungwon hides his sigh in a chuckle, “Hey, I’m a broke uni student. Who am I to turn down a free dinner, am I right?”

If sunlight could be translated into soundwaves, it would be audible the way Minhyuk brightens up at his answer; that’s close enough to soothe the nerves that are starting to build within Hyungown’s stomach. He chirps, “Great! Just come around seven or something. I’ll see ya then!” 

Hyungwon spends the rest of the afternoon trying to pick out an outfit that’s cool enough to justify his hanging out with members of an upcoming idol group. Halfway through what feels like his hundredth outfit change, his phone buzzes with a message from Minhyuk: _just wear jeans and a tee, you’re way cuter than any of the losers here anyway_

He’s about to type a reply when a second message comes through: _except for jooheon. no one is cuter than honey._ He’ll admit this to no one, but Hyungwon spends at least five minutes sulking over this before he picks himself up, and pretends to keep it together long enough to make a respectable attempt at his readings, until it’s time to leave for dinner.

To say he’s nervous is an understatement, Hyungwon takes a moment, and then another, then perhaps a few dozen more, to collect himself when he finally reaches their dorm. It’s almost 15 minutes past seven, and he’s been standing outside the door, looking to all the world like a stalker, trying to summon up the courage to press the door-bell. 

His phone buzzes: _i know you’re just lurking outside. just come in already!!_

As if to punctuate the statement, there’s suddenly pounding on the other side of the door, so harried and frantic it’s like the perpetuator is determined to knock the door down. Hyungwon startles for a second. 

“Chae Hyungwon, hurry your skinny butt up!” comes Minhyuk’s muffled voice, like he’s pressed up against the door frame, which Hyungwon knows he probably is. If he looks closely enough, he can almost see Minhyuk’s eye, spying on him through the peephole. “The food’s gonna get cold.”

Then another voice joins Minhyuk’s, matching him almost perfectly in terms of whininess, although much deeper in timber, “Minhyuk’s friend, I’m hungry. Just come in! We won’t bite.”

“You’re such a liar, you bite Shownu-hyung all the time.”

The voice sounds affronted, and Hyungwon can hear Minhyuk’s influence in the inflections of his reply, “That’s different. I’m _not_ going to bite your friend!”

“I’ll eat you if you even think of biting Wonnie.”

Hyungwon doesn’t know if Minhyuk’s members are usually _this_ loud, so much so that he can actually hear their bickering through a solid wooden door, but his nerves are allayed enough for him to lift his finger to the doorbell. 

The door swings open immediately, and there Minhyuk is, beaming brightly. His arms are open, always ready to receive Hyungwon, “There you are! We’ve been waiting.”

He introduces Hyungwon to each of the members, and it’s akin to the surreal feeling of suddenly meeting characters you've encountered only in novels in the flesh. Hyungwon now understands what Minhyuk means when he had previously texted _jooby is the cutest person in the world no offense no one else can ever be as cute as him_ , because Jooheon grins at him with chubby dumpling cheeks and Hyungwon is pretty much ready to adopt him as his child. 

Wonho smiles warmly at him, “It’s nice to finally meet you! Wow, Minhyuk wasn’t kidding when he said he had a handsome best friend.” and the comment would have sounded disingenuous from someone who looks like he himself had been carved by the Gods, if not for the way Wonho's eyes are shining with sincerity. Touched by his kindness, Hyungwon takes a second to send a prayer up to the universes for him, may he not be bullied too much by Minhyuk.

“Hope you’re hungry,” is what Shownu says by way of greeting, and Hyungwon’s stomach growls in response before he can say anything. He chuckles good-naturedly, covering up Hyungwon’s embarrassment, “Yea, so am I.”

Dinner is a spread of home-cooked delights - Minhyuk hadn’t been exaggerating in his texts when he’d mentioned that _ki is a p good cook even tho he keeps trying to make me eat cucumbers ‘_______’._ All seven of them are sitting on the living room floor, gathered around two small foldable tables that are heaving with the weight of the number of dishes. 

Hyungwon settles into the easy conversation the members fall into; they’re friendly and welcoming enough, readily including him into whatever conversation topic they’ve drifted on to. It’s incredibly domestic, and Hyungwon feels the slightest twinge of an indecipherable emotion in his gut. Before he can puzzle out the feeling, Minhyuk jabs him hard in the side.

“He made this for you,” Minhyuk mentions in a stage-whisper, nudging Hyungwon’s hand towards a plate of stir-fried prawns. More out of habit, he’d been absently picking through the bibim guksu on Minhyuk’s plate, placing the stray strands of cucumber on his own.

Kihyun blushes a light shade of red and sends Minhyuk a death glare that lasts a split second, then turns to Hyungwon with a sincere smile, shrugging easily, “Minhyuk mentioned you liked seafood.”

“Oh, yea I do,” Hyungwon blinks at him, even as that indecipherable feeling grows larger in size, threatens to fill his entire body. He buries it away, instead, takes a serving of the prawns onto his plate. “Thank you.”

“No problem,” Kihyun says; then grins wickedly, “We need your help to control Minhyuk after all.”

Minhyuk sticks his tongue out at Kihyun, and makes to fling himself at Kihyun in battle, before Shownu interrupts and changes the topic, as if he’s well used to their quarrels. It’s only when the conversation has moved on, Minhyuk placated beside him, that Hyungwon realises what the emotion is:

Jealousy; and the startling knowledge that Minhyuk is now no longer only just his.

It’s later that night, when Hyungwon is playing a mobile phone game with Minhyuk on his bed (he’d chased Changkyun out of their shared room, going to the lengths of hissing at him to demonstrate how serious he is about defending his territory), that Minhyuk asks, feigning a casual tone, “So what do you think of them?”

“They’re nice,” Hyungwon says, not looking up from his screen. He’ll have to go home soon, before the bus services stop.

Minhyuk slides over to Hyungwon’s side of the bed, his phone discarded to the side, “Buuuuuut?”

“Nothing!”

“Aww, are you jealous?” Minhyuk teases, cutting straight to the point like how he always manages to do. He plucks the phone out of Hyungwon’s hands and tosses it to the side.

With the game no longer a valid source of distraction, Hyungwon turns his attention to the rest of the room, how him and Changkyun have decorated it. There’s a small rush of pleasure at how Minyhuk’s tacked on photographs on the wall beside his bed; Hyungwon features in more than half of them. “N - no!”

“How are you going to be a lawyer, if you can’t even lie?” Minhyuk laughs, seeing through Hyungwon immediately. He leans in to rest his head against Hyungwon’s shoulder, a familiar position that Hyungwon finds himself setting into without even thinking about it. “Don’t worry Wonnie, I’ll always like you best.”

-

The group’s debut goes off without a hitch. 

Although Hyungwon holds back tears as he watches the performance live on his laptop screen, it’s hard not to collapse into happy tears when Minhyuk calls him, breathing out in wonder, “I can’t believe this is actually happening. It still doesn’t feel real.”

The first time Hyungwon hears Minhyuk in public, his husky voice holding its weight against the heavy eDM backing track, playing loudly from the cosmetic store, a group of university friends and him are walking past, on the way to a cheap BBQ place, Hyungwon freezes completely in his tracks. It’s only when one friend, not noticing that Hyungwon’s stopped walking, crashes into him and sends him crumpling to the floor like the paper-doll human he is, that Hyungwon jolts to his senses.

“Dude, you okay?” asks his classmate, helping him up with a hand. Hyungwon waves off the question, having other more pressing things on his mind.

Heart pounding fast, he pulls out his phone, and manages to catch the ending of Minhyuk’s verse before it transits into the other members’ parts. He’s about to send this to Minhyuk, halfway through composing a message along the lines of _listen to what i just heard playing on the streets! can you believe that you’re famous now?_ , when he’s interrupted by his friend.

“I didn’t know you were a fan,” the same classmate says, eyebrows raised, watching Hyungwon all this while with a bemused expression. “It’s - what’s their name again? Monster or somet -”

“ _Monsta_ X,” Hyungwon corrects, almost too sharply given how his classmate’s eyebrows shoot up even further. He ducks his head, slightly sheepish, “My, uh - “ _best friend?_ he doesn’t know why he hesitates, maybe it’s the realisation that Minhyuk is a real public figure now; he’d probably need to be careful of what information is circulating about him out there, “ - someone I know debuted with them.”

His classmate whistles, impressed, “Well, it takes guts to do something like that. They work really hard, don’t they? There are so many idols out there. It probably takes a miracle for your group to succeed.”

There’s a lump in his throat, made up of the private worries he has for Minhyuk and his future, of the ghost of the regret that he isn’t on this journey with Minhyuk, that he had gave it up just to be a boring, normal student; but Hyungwon answers, clear and sure, “He’ll be alright. Out of all the people out there, he’s going to make it.”

-

It goes to show how inevitably intertwined their lives are when Hyungwon is informed that the cafe he’s part-timing at would be hosting a birthday event for an idol. Since their debut more than half a year ago, Monsta X has had one other comeback. From the way that their social media presence has been growing (because obviously, Hyungwon tracks this religiously), it’s clear that the group is on the rise.

The manager looks down at his clipboard, says, not unkindly, “For Monster X’s Lee Minhyuk.”

“It’s _Monsta_ X,” the correction slips out of Hyungwon’s mouth before he can think it through; and the other baristas, particularly one that’s been extremely vocal about her love for the group and being a proud Monbebe, turn to him, surprised at his knowledge. 

Before Hyungwon can stammer out a fabricated reason, the manager just laughs the comment off, not at all offended. “Do you want to be on shift that weekend, Hyungwon? Since it sounds like you’re a fan of Monsta X.”

Hyungwon does a quick mental scan of his calendar, half amused by the irony of the situation: Minhyuk had said that he’d be busy with shoots that weekend. Well, if he can’t hang out with Minhyuk the real person, a good alternative would be to hang out in the presence of Minhyuk photographs and people who adore him, “Sure, that’ll be nice.”

The rest of the shift proceeds in such a busy fashion (said Monbebe barista whispering to him, in between customers, _who’s your bias?_ to which Hyungwon recalls how friendly the members have been to him so far, _Shownu-hyung_ , he says, without thinking too much of it; then realises his mistake when his colleague lets out a giggle at the use of the honorific, as if him and Shownu were actually friends) that Hyungwon forgets to tell Minhyuk about the cafe event. 

When he does remember though, he sends Minhyuk a quick text: _you wouldn’t believe what’s happening at my cafe this weekend_

It takes half a day before Minhyuk replies: _r they bringing in cute dogs :( take a picture of one for me_

Hyungwon stifles a laugh: _close enough. it’s a Lee Minhyuk birthday event_

Barely a minute later, Hyungwon receives Minhyuk’s ominous reply: _interesting…._

It goes to show how naive Hyungwon has grown because he doesn’t think too much of Minhyuk’s answer, how he's taken peace and quiet for granted . Besides, he’s got enough on his mind, between the growing pile of readings he has to start on and the multiple assignments that have looming deadlines. 

So, he almost gets a heart attack on Saturday, when he’s on shift during the birthday event, and there’s suddenly a high-pitched squeal, that breaks off into more panicked noises from the other customers. “Oh - oh my god, is that -”

From behind the counter, Hyungwon looks up at the sound of the commotion, reaching over for the closest kitchen implement he can use as a weapon in case it’s a robbery. Even with his skinny arms, he’s sure he can hold any intruder long enough for someone to call the police. Adrenaline pumping, Hyungwon’s all ready to jump into action when - 

The situation is much, _much_ worse than he anticipates.

Because there, standing at the entrance of his store, is one Lee Minhyuk, in all his beautiful idol glory. There’s a gaggle of fans around him, some with their phones out, already live-broadcasting this event, their eyes are wide with surprise and amazement. “He’s really here! Aaaah he’s so handsome in real life.”

Hyungwon resists the urge to smack his head against the counter when Minhyuk locks eyes with him, his expression mischievous, the way they always are after he’s pulled off a successful prank. Like Moses, he somehow manages to part a way through the ocean of fans, making his way to the counter.

“Hi! I’m Minhyuk,” he says brightly, looking innocent.

Hyungwon’s not fooled, although slightly unnerved by the number of cameras pointed at them, disembodied eyeballs watching their every move. He doesn’t know how Minyhuk can stand it. Even so, he has a job to do, and he musters up the politest customer service voice he has, “Welcome to our store. May I take your order?”

There’s a barely perceptible pause, filled with the dazzle of Minhyuk’s elation and amusement that Hyungwon has chosen to play along.

“Sure, I’d like a -” Minhyuk takes a second to read the menu. “What would you recommend?” he asks with a wink, and in response, the fans around swoon both in delight and envy. Hyungwon has to bite back a laugh, having witnessed Minhyuk practice this particular brand of charm a million times in the mirror.

“Can’t go wrong with an Americano.” Hyungwon’s eyes slide over to the display of sandwiches on the counter; Minhyuk follows the direction of his gaze, his eyes narrowing in hate when he notices cucumbers traitorously nestled in between the slices of bread. The knives and hatchets that Minhyuk’s flinging mentally at him is enough to make Hyungwon rethink recommending ‘some sustenance for our famished idol’. 

Minhyuk cuts in smoothly, all happy and not at all panicked, “Okay, I’ll trust your taste. One Americano, _that's all,_ please!”

Hiding behind Hyungwon is the other barista, the one who’s a _real_ Monbebe, who looks incredibly star-struck. As Hyungwon starts preparing Minhyuk’s drink, he turns to her, “Do you want to take a photo with him? I’m sure Min wouldn’t mind. Uh, Minhyuk, I mean.” He tacks on hastily, clumsily at the end, but in her shock, she doesn’t seem to have realised his slip-up.

“Me? Take a photo with him? Th - that’s ridiculous!”

Hyungwon snorts, “Believe me, he’s human, just like the rest of us.” It’s a useless statement though because she shakes her head violently enough to give herself a whiplash, and pushes Hyungwon to serve him the drink instead of her.

Minhyuk stays for about twenty minutes, making sure to sign everything that the fans thrust into his hands. A fond smile on his face, Hyungwon watches him; how he looks each person in the eyes, how gently he talks to them, listens to them so sincerely. It’s one thing to watch Minhyuk perform; another to see him in action like this. How funny it is - that Hyungwon feels pride, and the stirrings of something else, swelling in his chest.

“Thanks for the coffee! It was really great,” sings Minhyuk from the front of the cafe, when the last fan has had their merch signed, their heart listened to. He waves enthusiastically at Hyungwon, “See ya around Won - everyone!”

As expected, Minhyuk calls Hyungwon in the evening, when he’s home from his shift. He dives into the conversation, without any preamble, “Wasn’t that fun?”

“You almost gave my colleague a heart attack,” Hyungwon points out, although there’s a big grin on his face. 

“Well, you kept whining about how we couldn’t meet this weekend.”

“That’s because I wanted to pass you your birthday gift.” Hyungwon darts a look at the package resting on his desk. It’s wrapped rather badly. Maybe he should have asked the store-person to gift wrap it for him.

Anyway, no amount of wrapping paper would disguise the fact that all Hyungwon managed to afford was just a simple jacket from a throwaway street-wear brand he’d stumbled upon along Hongdae. It looked cool enough at that time, but probably was a pale imitation of what Minhyuk encounters in his cool idol life. 

“You could have just done it just now!”

“In front of everyone?”

“Yea, why not?” Minhyuk laughs, the sound of sunshine even this late at night, when the moon’s already taken her place in the dark sky. “Can you imagine all the rumours that would fly around if you did that!”

Hyungwon ignores the way his stomach flips at the thought, the implication behind the statement he’s sure he’s reading too much into. “It may have broken everyone’s hearts in the cafe right there.”

“They should know it’s too late anyway,” Minhyuk says lightly, in a way that Hyungwon can’t quite interpret. The words twinkle in the space between them, little stars emitting light in their mysterious ways, “You already have mine.”

-

Then, there are bad days. 

When Minhyuk is tired and dim from the never-ending rehearsals and back-to-back schedules, and has exhausted all his radiance during the constant cycle of interviews, fan-meetings, social media postings, and all the strange responsibilities an idol has to bear to sustain their time in the scorching spotlight. 

Looking from the outside, Hyungwon’s suddenly grateful he decided to quit while he was ahead, he’d end up a shrivelled husk if he were in Minhyuk’s place.

Those are the days he barely answers Hyungwon’s texts, sends the most non-commital of replies when Hyungwon asks what he wants to do for the day, when he has the time off (an occurrence that’s becoming more and more rare, as the group starts getting more popular amongst the general public - which Hyungwon both dutifully celebrates and privately loathes). 

By now, Hyungwon knows enough to just show up at the group’s dorm at the designated time, and leave the car engine running (the car belongs to Minhyuk’s parents, who always kindly lend the vehicle to him on Minhyuk’s days off, without even accepting Hyungwon’s offer to cover petrol costs). There’s nothing to do but wait until Minhyuk emerges, slips out of the door like a shadow, and into the front seat. He closes the door with a tiny thud that still sends the car shaking. 

“Hi,” he says, in the smallest voice, and Hyungwon knows perhaps today is a worse day than usual. Fittingly, the sunlight outside dims, as the clouds overhead drift past the Sun. “Can we just go over to your dorm?”

“Of course Min, whatever you want to do.”

“I’m just tired.”

“I’ll wake you up when we get there.”

On days like these, Minhyuk is difficult to read, a storm of thoughts brewing inside his head even as his face remains cloudy and overcast. He answers, _no_ or _I don’t know_ in an almost affronted tone, his lips pursing in a perennial pout, to everything Hyungwon suggests: from _do you want to play some games?_ to _what do you feel like having for dinner?_

So, he leaves Minhyuk be, lying sullenly on his messy bed, tapping through his phone listlessly - more out of having something to do than having any interest in what he’s looking at, while he works at his desk, starting on readings for the coming week.

Apart from the study playlist he has in the background (it’s low-fi study beats, like the poseur he is), it’s so quiet in the room that he thinks Minhyuk has fallen asleep. _Good_ , is what Hyungwon thinks, and pushes away the bitterness he can almost taste, annoyance from feeling like he’s had to babysit Minhyuk the whole day when he’s had a long week at university and work too, _he needs the rest anyway._

“Shownu-hyung and Wonho-hyung went out to wakeboard,” Minhyuk says suddenly, breaking the silence. There’s something in the way he says it that belies the slightest hint of jealousy, that borders almost on an accusation.

Hyungwon counts to ten before he replies. He turns to face the boy sitting on his bed, small amongst the sheets, “Did you want to go with them?”

“No,” Minhyuk looks away from him, down at the phone in his hands. “I don’t know.”

This time he counts to five, and keeps his voice steady - imagines himself in a future years from now when he’s a lawyer in court and has to keep his emotions under control, “I’ll get pizza for dinner.”

(Minhyuk thaws over the evening, finally breaks into a real smile over pizza and Haikyuu. He leans into Hyungwon, chewing noisily while delivering a continuous commentary of the show: weird trivia that he’s read online during his breaks between practice, his favourite character and why he likes them, whether a move can actually be executed in real life or not.

“I’m sorry I’m like this,” he whispers to Hyungwon, later when they’re tangled together in Hyungwon’s tiny bed. They’re both tall, lanky people and the bed was certainly not built to hold two, but they manage somehow, a mess of limbs and odd angles. Minhyuk’s arms are thrown around his waist, his face almost buried in his chest, he can feel the little puffs of air with each exhale. Hyungwon wouldn’t change anything for the world. “Were you upset by it?”

Hyungwon hesitates between the convenient lie and the uncomfortable truth. But Minhyuk is eagle-eyed as ever, and he deflates visibly as he tries to shift away. Hyungwon holds him in place, murmurs into the crown of his head, “If I said anything, it’d just make you more upset, wouldn’t it?”

“That’s not the point! I want to know,” Minhyuk answers, heat in his words. He looks up at Hyungwon, from where he’s lying: his eyes are watery but he keeps his gaze fixed on him. For all the screaming that Hyungwon’s seen online about how _sexy and cool Minhyuk looks when he’s intense!!!_ , Hyungwon doesn’t think any one of those single fans would want to be in his place right now. “You’ve to tell me.”

“Even if it hurts your feelings?”

“ _Especially_ if it hurts my feelings,” the boy emphasises, and butts his head against Hyungwon’s chest gently. He manages a laugh, the breath tickles the underneath of Hyungwon’s chin, and it causes him to smile along with Minhyuk, “You can keep my head from growing too big.”

“Well,” Hyungwon says, carding his fingers through Minyhuk’s hair, tracing little swirls onto his head. His hair is dry and a little scratchy, even with the crazy treatment he’s seen Minhyuk lather onto his skull, from all the bleaching and colouring it’s going through. “Your head can’t grow too big if not it’d never fit on this bed.”

Minhyuk scoffs indignantly, “I’ll buy you a new bed. I’m a superstar now you know.”

It’s an open opportunity right there and he’s loath to pass it up, so Hyungwon goes ahead with his brilliant comeback, “Tell that to your music chart rankings.”

“I hate you,” the boy shoots back, without any real malice, as he curls into Hyungwon’s embrace, as if he could get any more closer than they already were in the tiny space. Past a certain point, he’s sure Minhyuk would only be satisfied if they became molded into one body with the way he’s wiggling.

“Go to sleep Min.”

“Not as much as Korea sleeps on us,” Minhyuk adds, and they both collapse into a fit of giggles that eventually peter out as the day finally catches up with them and all but hauls them off into a peaceful slumber.)

-

Hyungwon realises his feelings for Minhyuk on a fine spring day, when the boy is sitting in front of him, practicing questions for an upcoming fansign. 

There’s nothing particularly remarkable that happens: they’re both in Hyungwon’s dorm room, sitting cross-legged on the floor. Hyungwon has his textbook opened in his lap, while Minhyuk’s scrolling through his phone, going through a list of questions Starship had sent them, of possible things and actions that fans may ask them to do during the fansign.

“If someone asks me to do _aegyo,_ I’m going to do this.” Hyungwon’s just been letting Minhyuk chatter on to himself; doesn’t realise that this time, any action on his is required until Minhyuk’s hand darts into his field of vision and nonchalantly flips his textbook shut with a pointed thud. He looks up from his now closed book to see Minhyuk’s face, puffed up in annoyance. “Are you going to pay attention now?”

“Yea yea, you have my fullest attention and more,” answers Hyungwon lazily, not realising how much he’s going to live to regret these words.

“Okay, if I have to do _aegyo_ , I’m gonna do this,” Minhyuk repeats, then lifts his left hand to frame his eye with a peace-sign, pouting at the same time.

The effect is instantaneous.

Hyungwon experiences what must be a black out because the next thing he registers is that Minhyuk’s suddenly just a few centimeters from him, his face all scrunched up in concern. That, and the thought: _oh shit._

Misinterpreting Hyungwon’s dazed expression, he asks, “Was it a little too much?”

“N - no,” Hyungwon says, leaning backwards so that there’s more distance between him and Minhyuk; all but resists the urge to scramble away. His eyes dart down for the slightest second to Minhyuk’s lips, _oh shit_ before he forces them back up to meet Minhyuk’s eyes. _He likes Minhyuk. Like he likes Minhyuk for real. How could this happen? When did this even happen?_

It’s a miracle that he still has the mental capacity to form a sentence, given how fast his mind is racing, “It looks cute. Monbebe will love it for sure.”

“Okay!” Minhyuk beams, has all the energy of a puppy wagging its tail after being rewarded for a new trick it’s learnt. He reaches over to open Hyungwon’s textbook. “You can go back to your studying now.”

“Gr - great, thanks,” Hyungwon says. He tears his gaze away from Minhyuk, down to the words on his textbook but it’s useless. It’s not like there’s any space left in his head apart from the truth shining in neon-bright font in his head, so magnificent that it’s impossible to deny.

_He, Chae Hyungwon, has a crush on Lee Minhyuk._

-

It takes a while for Hyungwon to decide that he should confess his feelings to Minhyuk. The ethics of keeping it a secret weighs heavily on him, ever since he’d came to the realisation that his affections for Minhyuk extended to beyond just a _best friends who’d been roommates some may say soulmates?_ kind of straightforward simple friendship. He reasons that it’s unfair to Minhyuk not to know that he’s been harbouring these feelings for him when the latter’s an idol and probably has a legal obligation to remain and appear available for his many, many fans.

As with all things Minhyuk, when the situation does arise, it’s both easier and harder than he thought it’d be.

The day Hyungwon finally summons up the courage to tell Minhyuk, Minhyuk surprises him instead by shoving the Starship contract into his hands. “Turn to page 23,” he says; and Hyungwon, well used to Minhyuk’s strange ways, obediently complies, is all too happy to have a distraction to delay the moment in which he ruins their friendship anyway.

Highlighted on page 23 in bright yellow with doodles of whales around is: “REGULATIONS FOR DATING”. His stomach plummets so fast, it turns into a pool of icky organs around his feet.

“Um?” Hyungwon says, or attempts to; even in that one syllable, his voice sounds unnaturally high.

It’s then that Minhyuk averts his gaze, a red blush creeping steadily across his face as he says, “It only says we can’t have a girlfriend because Starship is homophobic and lame.”

There’s something unsaid lurking behind Minhyuk’s words, but Hyungwon’s brain is moving too slowly to tease it out, still caught on the bright yellow highlight, practically luminescent. 

“That doesn’t seem like a good way to write a contract though,” is what he says instead, his aspiring Law Persona taking charge of the situation. “If they want to cover all bases, they should just say it’s a ban against dating, regardless.”

He thumbs through the contract, eyes running over the sub-clauses detailed in the document, “It’s literally written here, Min. No dating, in general.”

Minhyuk lets out an exasperated noise, and snatches the contract out of Hyungwon’s hands. “Are you being dumb right now?”

“No?” Hyungwon answers, genuinely perplexed by the sudden sharpness of Minhyuk’s tone. His confusion must show through his expression though because Minhyuk softens.

“Okay then, well,” and here Minhyuk takes a deep breath, steeling himself. 

It’s in this split second that Hyungwon, a person intimately familiar with the different ways Minhyuk presents himself - how he speaks, how he stands, how he breathes when he’s upset or happy or agitated, knows. In this moment, Hyungwon is suddenly so _sure_ that all his worrying has been for nought. 

So he cuts in, before Minhyuk can finish his sentence, blurting out the words that he thought would be so difficult to say, “I like you.”

The look of surprise on Minhyuk’s face only lasts for a second or two, then transitions into a burst of happiness. But before Hyungwon can say anything else, Minhyuk’s expression turns sly, and Hyungwon barely has time to brace himself before Minhyuk says, like it’s a logical natural progression to their conversation, “Great, let’s get married then!”

“What?” Hyungwon splutters.

“The contract doesn’t say anything about marriage, only dating,” Minhyuk smoothly continues, clearly relishing being back in control of the situation. Honestly, Hyungwon should have known better than to steal his thunder like that. He wags his finger, as he tutts, all disappointed, “Sheesh, do they think marriage isn’t for young folks too? That’s ageist.”

“Min, gay marriages aren't even legal here.”

"Details, details. You lawyers are all so boring,” Minhyuk makes a show of rolling his eyes. Then he turns to Hyungwon, and asks, like he’s issuing a challenge, “So?”

“So?”

“So are you gonna kiss me now or what?”

This request, Hyungwon is too happy to oblige, if only to get Minhyuk to stop asking any more questions he doesn’t think he’ll have the answers to. Minhyuk has, after all, the rest of their lives together to keep bewildering him and Hyungwon is willing, is so ridiculously excited to keep giving him the opportunity to.

-

When Minhyuk tells the other members, only Shownu and Wonho have the decency to look surprised. Hyungwon always knew there was a reason why he liked those two more than the rest of the group, who are either rolling their eyes or gasping dramatically like Victorian ladies who’d just seen a bare ankle. 

“We never could have known!” exclaims Victorian Lady No 1, Im Changkyun, putting a hand up to his forehead and swooning into Victorian Lady No 2, Lee Jooheon, who’s next to him. “It was such a well kept secret.”

“Seriously, hyung,” says Jooheon, after they’ve managed to settle down. They’ve sort of arranged themselves into a heap in the living room area: Minhyuk, Hyungwon and Jooheon on the couch, Minhyuk squished in between the two; the other four lounging around on the floor. He turns to Minhyuk with a pout, lips jutting out, cheeks full. Hyungwon can’t even blame Minhyuk for squealing and almost elbowing Hyungwon in the process of throwing his arms around Jooheon. “Did you really think we didn’t figure it out?”

“But we only _just_ got together!”

From the floor, Kihyun lets out a loud snort, which earns him an aimed kick at his head from Minhyuk which Hyungwon manages to intercept in time. “Sorry, the puppy still needs a little more training.”

“You’re supposed to be on my side!” Minhyuk whines. 

“I’ll be on your side when you start paying for your own meals.”

Minhyuk scoffs, but doesn’t come back with a retort, which earns impressed noises from the room, having been burnt by Minhyuk too many times. _Tough_ , it’s only around Year 6 of being Minhyuk’s friend that one learns how to out talk him, even then, one still only has a success rate of 50%, given how fast the puppy learns new methods of biting at the ankles of any who dare challenge him.

Instead, Minhyuk turns to Shownu, like it’s something that’s just occurred to him, “Hyung, you won’t tell anyone, will you?” The question comes out all breezily but Hyungwon can see through him; he hears the slightest hint of worry in Minhyuk’s ask. It’s clear to everyone in the room who exactly _anyone_ refers to; and that the question is posed to all the members, not just Shownu.

Shownu hums in thought.

“I promise, this won’t get in the way of work,” Hyungwon stammers, even as his throat goes dry. He’s not sure why he’s more nervous speaking to Shownu than speaking to Minhyuk’s father (though, to be fair, he’s been long assimilated into the Lee Household; he suddenly remembers that they haven’t broken the news to Minhyuk’s parents yet, and now the fear of going through this conversation again with Minhyuk’s parents joins the icy nervousness now running through his veins). “And - “

“Don’t worry, I know,” Shownu says, as he chuckles awkwardly. A beat passes; he continues, eyes crinkling up in a smile, “You always were already but welcome to the family.”

-

It shouldn’t come as a surprise - but little changes when they start dating.

Minhyuk is the same bright affectionate being that he always is, except for the days when he’s not and Hyungwon offers him enough shelter to recharge and regain his light. He still texts Hyungwon at the same intensity (i.e. ‘the limit does not exist’), still drains his battery with a million photos of where they are, what they’re doing, and eating, selcas of him all made-up at whatever schedule they’re at.

Hyungwon realises now, that the swooping feeling in his stomach when he opens up his phone, only to see a new photo of Minhyuk winking back at him isn’t indigestion but affection. For an aspiring lawyer, it seems like he still has much to learn about the world around.

The only difference - and this is the _best_ difference in Hyungwon’s opinion - are the kisses he now gets to receive and give. He’s familiar with holding Minhyuk’s hand (don’t best friends do that all the time? the answer is no, but don’t tell past Hyungwon with his repressed crush that); he’s familiar with Minhyuk’s hugs and cuddles (because that’s just natural when you’ve been sharing a bed with your best friend for years; once again, don’t blame past Hyungwon for how deep he’d waded in the the river called denial).

He’d thought he’d learnt everything that he’d ever needed to know about Minhyuk; but now, Hyungwon knows that he’s completely wrong. 

There’s a whole catalogue of kisses that he’s now privileged enough to learn about one Lee Minhyuk, and Minhyuk’s more than happy to share the knowledge.

-

“But honestly,” Minhyuk asks one day, when they’re out for ice-cream sometime on a nice spring day, sometime around the second year of them dating; the third year after Monsta X’s debut. 

It’s breezy enough, with the cold wind curling around his ankles, that Hyungwon wishes he’d worn something longer than the bermudas he’d chosen in his haste to meet Minhyuk. They’re walking side by side, in one of those tiny parks, hidden away in a residential area. Hands close enough so that they could hypothetically accidentally brush in what would seem like an entirely platonic way to an nosy on-looker. It’s a good day, Hyungwon thinks, pleased with the strawberry cone he’s picked out. “Does it frustrate you?”

Hyungwon’s attention is fixed on trying to lick the bit of ice-cream that’s trailing down the side of his cone, too preoccupied to register what Minhyuk’s asked. He almost gets it all when Minhyuk nudges him, not unroughly, and his nose smudges straight into the cone. 

“Wonnie, I’m asking a serious question,” Minhyuk whines, looking entirely unapologetic at how Hyungwon now looks like a clown that’s just starting on his makeup.

He sighs loudly and rummages around his pockets for a packet of tissue to wipe the cold ice-cream off his nose. Huffing impatiently, Minhyuk shoves a napkin into his hands and scrunches his face up in a pout as he waits for Hyungwon to primly dab at his nose, before Hyungwon finally asks, “What frustrates me?”

“You know,” Minhyuk exclaims, the words tumbling out before he cuts himself off, suddenly shy. His eyes dart downwards, at his scuffed up Converse shoes, as he continues, almost mumbling, “When I’m sad around you.”

Hyungwon gasps, all exaggerated and dramatic, “You _are_? I never noticed.”

Minhyuk’s indignance bursts out of him, “I’m being serious!” He whacks Hyungwon lightly on the arm, shyness immediately discarded.

"It’s just part of who you are, isn’t it?”

“But I’m so happy around fans all the time,” there’s a certain hesitation in Minhyuk. It’s been building up within him, Hyungwon can tell, from the way he’s leaving so many things unsaid, lets these unasked parts dart around the nooks and crevices of the words he chooses instead. “I’m supposed to be the mood maker.”

Shrugging, Hyungwon says, “That’s your job. I can’t expect you to stay the same all the time.” The cone has melted around his hand, strawberry sweet sticky on his fingers.

“But - ”

“I won’t lie and say it’s easy when sometimes, you get tired and upset,” Minhyuk’s face falls at this, like a light going out. Hyungwon continues, leans to one side so his fingers, the clean ones, of course, accidentally catch Minhyuk’s, “But we have the rest of our lives to figure this out, don’t we?”

Embarrassed laughter tumbles out of Minhyuk, and he untangles their fingers to push Hyungwon lightly away. His cheeks are coloured pink, not only because of the cold. It’s an adorable look, it really is, “You’re really sappy sometimes, you know.”

Hyungwon hums, not in disagreement, “That or I could ask you to pay for my therapy bills having to counsel your sad ass all the time.”

“How about a lifetime of hugs instead?” 

He pretends to consider this for a moment, “Can I upgrade them to kisses?”

“Only if you pay for a Premium membership.”

“Then it’s alright," Hyungwon hums, much to Minhyuk's indignation. "Let’s just stick to hand holding forever.”

-

It’s several years later: countless comebacks accomplished, double-digits music shows won, and most importantly, four daesangs achieved. Hyungwon, on the other hand, has finally navigated the intricacies of becoming a lawyer, having passed his bar exam the year before.

It doesn’t feel quite real that so much has changed, yet nothing at all. The two of them are bundled together in Minhyuk’s bed (now, thankfully upgraded to a queen’s size that’s better able to hold both their lanky frames), back at his parent’s place. 

“Wonnie, did you ever regret it?” Minhyuk asks, as he plays with Hyungwon’s hand, lacing and unlacing their fingers. _Not debuting with me_ , goes unasked but Hyungwon knows what he's referring to.

“Sometimes,” Hyungwon confesses. “Sometimes I’m not sure if I gave up too early.”

Propping himself up on one elbow, Minhyuk muses, putting on a showy pensive look, “Can you imagine if we were in the same group together?”

“It would either have been so much fun or we would have torn each other apart by the end of the first year.”

“And Dispatch would have a field day. They’d be like trailing one of us, trying to get a new dating scoop, but it’d be like, _oh they’re just hanging out with their members again. How boring._ and go home in their snake-mobile.” Minhyuk’s eyes gleam devilishly. “It would have been the ultimate F you.”

“You scare me sometimes, Lee Minhyuk.”

“Don’t pretend you’re not attracted by it,” Minhyuk scoffs. He leans in towards Hyungwon far enough so that gravity pulls him down and he tumbles straight into Hyungwon’s face.

“But whatever it is, it doesn’t matter anyway,” Hyungwon continues, ignoring Minhyuk’s antics. He brings his arms up to hug the idol from behind in a seemingly romantic gesture, but mostly to restrain Minhyuk so he stops shuffling around like a restless thing. “Because whichever paths our lives took, I know we’d have gone through it together anyway.”

“Is that your way of saying you want to stay with me forever?”

“Maybe.”

“Just say you love me and get it over with, you emotionally constipated human being,” Minhyuk wiggles out of Hyungwon’s embrace, and turns to stick his tongue out at him.

“I’ll consider it,” Hyungwon answers, then flinches as Minhyuk kicks him under the blankets, all while snuggling closer to Hyungwon at the same time in the typical way that Lee Minhyuk displays his affection. They descend into some sort of tickle fight that ends up with Minhyuk taking up three-quarters of the bed and all of the blankets, leaving Hyungwon shivering on his tiny slice of land.

From his blanket fortress, Minhyuk declares with the superiority of a winner, “You’ve to stay there and reflect on your sins!” and giggles himself into half-slumber, although not before he throws out the thinnest blanket he’s acquired, kind enough not to let Hyungwon freeze to death.

It’s only later at night, that Minhyuk’s answer comes, in between slow puffs of sleep, “Wonnie, in whatever universe out there, you know that I would have been beside you the whole way too right?”

Hyungwon smiles, as Minhyuk rolls slowly into his arms. He holds him close, breaths in the scent of home and the promise of the intangible yet solid forever their bond holds, “I know.”

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! as always, i'll be super grateful for any kudos or comments if you enjoyed the fic <:
> 
> fun fact: the entire genesis of this fic was the random train of thought of 'omg what if hw decided not to debut' + the need to write min's quip about getting married re: starship's dating ban, and somehow this entire mess happened
> 
> you can also find me on:  
> \- [twitter](https://twitter.com/legofroggo)  
> \- [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.qa/legofroggo)


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